A few weeks ago, I read a blog, as I am known to do... This blog was awesome, and can be read here if you are interested. It's a blog written by a mom, about how her daughter bore the brunt of her negative attitude and feelings. It's not completely related to my journey that I am on, but I found myself with a big takeaway from it... Three simple words, that I have now adopted as my mantra:
But love who, you may ask?
Everyone. Your friends, your family, your coworkers, other drivers, people at the grocery store, people you talk to on the phone...
And a very special person that is often-times overlooked, especially if you are a grown adult living your life as most of us are -- busy.
That special person is YOU. We bend over backwards to love others (well, most of us do!)... But sometimes we just need to take a deep breath, step back, and show ourselves that we care. As I gain steam and keep rolling along into this mission to better myself that I have made, I'm realizing that it really is true what they say (whoever "they" are) -- it's really hard to fully love someone unless you really love yourself.
Like the case of the mom in the blog I borrowed my mantra from, my negativity always had the potential to seep into other parts of my life, and onto other people in my life. I found myself feeling badly about myself, and wanting to come home after a day at work and just sleep the evening away. This gave up my time to spend with friends, or with David, and then everyone got shorted (because who wouldn't want to spend time with ME???). I found myself always saying no to activities that David wanted to do, like bike riding and going for walks, because I hated the way that my body felt while doing it. And I found that it was so much easier and made me so much happier to give in to the stuff that I wanted to throw into my body.
It's only been a few weeks, Mandy -- get off your high horse, you are probably saying (hey, we're all thinking it... even me...). But I'm not at all meaning to sound like that. I haven't gone vegan and totally organic and taken up hot yoga and balanced my chakras... I'm not anywhere close. But I am starting to notice the effects of eating healthier, being proud of what I put into my body, and feeling like I'm in control. And we all know that I love to be in control. I'm trying to be more mindful of my body, and I'm starting to notice the tiny effects that my attitude can bring.
This last week was my first week doing Weight Watchers again, and I'm insanely happy. Not only did the scale report that I lost 4.4 pounds, but my confidence has really boosted. I have set small goals for myself, and have learned to be kinder and more loving to myself if I slip up, because it happens. It's only been a WEEK, geesh... :P But like I said above, I am feeling confident, and am finding pride in making healthier decisions for myself. I have cooked meals almost the entire week, and found new recipes that I really love and am going to keep repeating. This is new for me, people. I am NOT the cook in our house. But I feel like I am starting to take charge of that, and it's actually really fun! I know -- what have you done with Mandy? Trust me, I'm as floored as you may be. The second you hear me say that about doing laundry or dishes, though, please seriously call the government, because I HAVE been body snatched.
4.4 pounds lost, a 4 1/2 mile bike ride last week, and just a more positive outlook that I've had for the last week and a half or so -- these things have all contributed and made my mantra of "only love today" so much easier. I keep it as my phone background so I see it constantly - only love today. Only love today. And the other fun part is that you can emphasize each word, and it gives it a different meaning. I'm a nerd like that.
ONLY love today -- Cut the rest of the crap. That's it. Limit yourself to focus on the love.
Only LOVE today -- Remember, not "like", or "tolerate", or "avoid and it seems like I'm loving.". LOVE. LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE.
Only love TODAY -- We both know that the mantra won't change. It will be the same tomorrow as well. But if you are struggling, just take it one day at a time and focus on loving yourself and others. Because the secret is, it will come again tomorrow. And you can bite off just as much as you can chew today!
So join me in embracing this mantra. I'd like to hear how it works for you if you choose to adopt it for a bit and see what changes it has made. :)
Thanks for coming along with me on this journey. I would get lonely without you, and sometimes I will need someone else to drive. But I promise you there will be snacks, and the kind of music that you say to yourself "ok, I have to admit it... I DO love this song."
Only love today, friends. <3